How long to wait before bringing religiousness and spirituality in practice

Praying people

Marc Minter thinks most churchgoers would fully acknowledge “Prayer is essential in the life of every Christian“.  Most churchgoers would fully acknowledge this as a reality, but some may be embarrassed to answer any questions regarding the frequency, intentionality, or purpose of their own prayers.  In public you would not find many Christians praying any more. The only ones you see on the streets, parking spaces, stations or airports, praying are Muslims. It looks like they are the only ones who are not afraid to pray in public.

Luke tells us that Jesus said people ought to “always pray and not lose heart” (Luke 18:1), but we do not seem to see many people pray and openly confess their love for God.

Responsible churchgoers

I would not agree with Marc Linter about the fact that most churchgoers would accept some responsibility for evangelism generally. Perhaps they might think there should be some evangelism, but nobody dares to take the steps to go out, except the Jehovah Witnesses and the Mormons, though these can be seen less than in the 1960ies and 1970ies.

I wonder where those Christians would like to take their tasks up, Jesus has given them. I must admit that for me it is also very frustrating to notice that also I can not get more Christadelphians to come out to preach or to join this internet magazine about spiritual and religious lifestyle. I wonder where those evangelists stay? Where are those Christians to take up their voice in the name of the Most High? Where are those willing to preach about the coming Kingdom of God? Even to find people who would like to help others to find ways to look at life and to understand the human way of thinking are difficult to find. Up to now I did not find any writer who presented himself or herself to come to write for Stepping Toes about the history of humankind and of philosophy or to shed a light on the archaeology or write about Christian history or to write about different religions. This are important subjects to know more and to create more understanding? But who wants to share his or her knowledge?

Requirement to participate in personal evangelism

I do agree with Marc Minter that personal evangelism and the clear requirement of every Christian to participate, would cause a bit of discomfort to say the least. Today many are afraid to give sight of their opinion or do not like that others have other ideas than they. Creating an internet magazine where the authors do accept that other writers may have other insights and are willing others also to show the different views, is not an easy choice. But we do believe in an open mind and are willing to admit we can not know everything. Lots of things are also untold in the Scriptures or are left open. We do believe the things we can not know for sure should not be a burden of faith, and can be interpreted à volonté. Who is going to decide it is this or that way? We just will have to wait until the end-times, to hear Jesus explaining everything and making all clear. We better trust him and wait for his return.

Vasily Perov's painting illustrates clandestin...

Vasily Perov’s painting illustrates clandestine meetings of Christians in pagan Kiev. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In the mean time we should try to help each other to get insight. It is a matter of brotherly love. Prayer and evangelism should mark the lives of every Christian, and no less than Jesus Himself has commanded his followers thus. In the previous articles you could already see that Jesus provided examples of prayer (Luke 5:16; 6:12; 9:28; Matthew 19:13; John 11:41-42) You could also read that prayer is an intimate connection with an imminent Counsellor and Omnipotent Provider. From Scriptures we also got to know that we must ask guidance and knowledge. But in the examples is also given that we must pray we may have and give love. Part of this love is the sharing of knowledge and helping each other to come to the truth.

Regarding evangelism, Marc Minter writes:

Jesus commissions all who would follow him to “make disciples” of all people groups everywhere (Matthew 28:19).  While some may attempt to distinguish the group described by terms like believer and disciple, I find no reason at all in Scripture to do so.  In fact, the two appear to be synonymous when referring to one’s relationship to Christ (Acts 9:26; John 8:31).  Therefore, the commission given by Christ to all His followers at least includes evangelism.  Discipleship may refer to much more than conversion, but no one would rationally argue that it refers to less. {Jesus, Prayer & Evangelism}

Action of discipleship

Christians should be so much more aware that discipleship in Christ should really mean following the teachings of Christ Jesus. Not only being aware of the Commandments of Christ, but living according them. Knowing that Jesus is our mediator between God and man we should trust this barrister and follow his counsel. Jesus planted the seeds and wants us also to plant seeds in the knowledge that we also shall have to give them water.  We should water the world by spreading the Good News and by relating our live and the live of others to the World of God.

Christ followers may tell others of the good news, and rely upon God to give the growth; that is they rely upon the Spirit of God to transform the soul of sinners (John  3:3).  This then is where evangelism and prayer intersect, and again Christ affords both instruction and example. {Jesus, Prayer & Evangelism}

Unity and estimation of the value or worth of a person or thing

It is not because we may have different opinions, prevailing or popular feeling or view, about certain matters that there would not be unity in faith or unity in believe.  Jesus asked the Father to bring unity of belief in the truth of Christ’s person and work to all those that the Father gives the Son. When Jesus desired that the people God would draw and would give to him, he hoped God would listen to his wishes and bring all those in Christ to be with him where Jesus is, in order that they may behold his glory, which Jehovah God has given his son Jeshua, Jesus Christ the Messiah.

““father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am; so that they may see my glory, which you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.” (John 17:24 CJB)

We should know that it is God Who allows people to come to Him. We may help to get people to know God, but we shall not be able to make them fully accept the Most High. It will be up to them to make the choice and to follow the call from God. Are task is just one of helping Jesus and be an instrument in the Hands of God.

Doing yourself

We may not leave everything in the hands of others. In case we are calling ourselves Christian, we should show the world that we are followers of Christ. We can not leave it to wait, because we should know the end-times are near, and out of brotherly love we should like to have everybody be saved. Therefore we should now that Now is the right time to witness to someone. Postponement about preaching is something which is not in accordance with the commandments of Christ.

What does a Christian need to know before witnessing or evangelizing?  Must a Christian wait to witness to someone until he or she is burdened or compelled by some inward sensation?

asks Marc Minter, being aware that this question may be phrased in numerous ways and yet ask basically the same thing. He continues:

I think asking and answering three larger questions will help us answer these and others more definitively, as well as guide our understanding of evangelism or witnessing in general. {Should a believer wait to have a “burden” before witnessing?}

Being religious and spiritual demands action of evangelion

Many may say they are religious and several people claim to be spiritual. But of those who are religious and spirituality minded are willing to find the real True Creator God? And of those who found God are willing to share their experiences and are willing to share their love for God and for God His creation?

Evangelism comes from the word evangel, which is a transliteration of the Greek word euangelion, meaning good message.  The message called good is that singularly wonderful message of how God promised and performed all that was necessary to save sinners in the person and work of Christ.  Therefore, evangelism is the activity of proclaiming or telling of that great message. {Should a believer wait to have a “burden” before witnessing?}

But how many are seeing and knowing that great message? How many are prepared to awaken to that Good News and alert the world of the coming Kingdom of God? Only by bringing in practice the spreading of the Good News a person can show his or her full appreciation for that Marvellous Message of which the whole world should be conscious.

Willingness to attest

Evangelism is the willingness to attest euangelion, meaning good message. It is the willingness of telling of the Gospel (the good message of salvation through Christ). This telling should be our witnessing or testifying to the trustworthiness of that message which we do believe came a reality by the becoming flesh of the Word of God, about two millennia ago.

“The Word was in the beginning, and the Word was with God, and the Word was a God.” (The New Testament in An Improved Version)

“The Word was to His essence absolute deity” (Kenneth S. Wuest’s “The New Testament) and we should let It resound all over the world.

“In the beginning the Word having been and the Word having been unto God and God having been the Word he having been, in the beginning, unto God all through his hand became: and without him not even one being whatever became.” (Yah Chanan, John 1:1-3, Aramaic New Covenant;  ANCJ)

Jesus to look at as the fulfilment of God His Words and promises

Jesus coming into this world is the fulfilment of the words spoken by God, in the Garden of Eden, before Abraham existed. For ages God gave His Word to the world, but now His Word was presented by His own son to all people in the world.

Today everybody should receive the opportunity to hear words of Christ Jesus the Messiah who made the Words of God more understandable and known to all.

In which way are you willing to have that Word of God resound in the world?

We have heard Jesus his words and can listen to his parables, which should give us an understanding of the Work and Way of Thinking of The Supreme Being, the Only One God, our Father and the Father of Jesus Christ.

Deserters of the Faith of Jesus

Sculpture - head of Jesus Christ

Sculpture – head of Jesus Christ (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Often I am amazed how quickly the so called “Newborn Christians” are deserting Him who called them by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel. Lots of worldly ideas became intermingled and many go looking by other religions to find their thing. Our believe in God the Father as the One who raised Jesus from the dead should make that we also believe that we will be able to look forward to such a moment that we shall be raised from the dead. This should make us so happy and so full of expectations that we should not be able to stay quiet about that Good News which is given to us by Jesus Christ and his apostles.

The apostle Paul had good reason to remind the Galatians of this. The resurrection was proof of God’s complete satisfaction with the work of Christ for our salvation. Apparently, the Galatians were not wholly satisfied with the Saviour‘s work, because they were trying to improve on it by adding their own efforts at law-keeping. Paul was called by the risen Christ, in contrast to the twelve apostles, who were called by the Lord Jesus during His earthly ministry. This calling of somebody who was not prepared to come to Jesus when he was alive, should also give us hope that we, who could not see Jesus, can be called and still follow Jesus. Like the apostle Paul became a worker for Jesus his message, we also can become workers and messengers of that Good News.

Like Paul was amazed that the Galatians should so suddenly surrender the truth of the gospel, and he solemnly labelled their action as deserting God for a false gospel, we also should let others know when they go astray. When people, after God called them, are putting themselves under the curse of the law we should try to help them to stay on the right track. It is our duty to help those around us. When we are prepared to help them and to give them advice, we bring our unconditional love for them in practice. We should try to bring people to accept the true gospel and than should take care that they would not abandon it for a different gospel which is not good news at all.

Coming forward independent of man

When we notice a perverted message, a mixture of grace and law, or teachings which are disturbing us because they want to distort the gospel of Christ, than we should come to witness, even when we do have to step on the toes of somebody. Therefore those who found the love of God, believe in the salvation by Christ, should come forward and let their voice bring the Good News all over the world.

We at the Belgian Ecclesia would love to give those who are willing to help spread the Good News, a place for their voice.
You too can became a co-author on this internet blog or internet lifestyle magazine. When you are willing to let others see the words that come not as such from you or any other man, but which you received through a revelation of יהושע Messiah, you could be the person to help with us spread the Good News.

In case you want to reveal God His Son in you, like we want to reveal Christ in us so that we together might bring him, the Good News, to the gentiles, to those who have not yet found the salvation of Christ. Like Paul demonstrated his independence of other men in connection with his gospel, we also do not have to have a worldly connection to one or the other denomination to be saved or to be a messenger in the name of Christ. He is it who should be our cornerstone, and not a specific organisation or church of the world. Our Church should be the Church of God under the guidance of our master teacher Jesus Christ.

And as such people may be surprised that we do dare to refer to different websites from totally different denominations. Some people let us already know that they are chocked that we mention writings from this or that denomination, or that we quote from people who are from opposing denominations. But we consider Jesus the head of the Church, and it is for him that we want to be instruments in the Hand of his Father, our only One God.

The Four Evangelists

The Four Evangelists (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

After his conversion, Paul did not immediately confer with human leaders, nor did he go up to Jerusalem where the other apostles were. Instead, he went to Arabia, then returned again to Damascus. His determination to avoid Jerusalem was not out of disrespect for his fellow-apostles; it was rather because he had been commissioned by the risen lord himself and given a unique ministry to the Gentiles (Galatians 2:8). Hence his gospel and his service needed no human authorization. He was independent of man altogether.

We on this platform also want to be independent of a human organisation, though we do agree we need some human organisation and official statue. We do have to apply to the laws of Belgium, Europe and Internationally. As such we do take on a non-profit position and have a community on this earth. But God His Laws are the most high, and are the ones we want to follow in the first place, and we want also others to get to know them.
The authors on this site, who all write from their own vision and keep their own responsibility, are not paid for their work, nor are those working at the office in Belgium. Though any organisation has its legal obligations and has to find accommodation somewhere, that is ‘are connected’ to the world, because no matter what happens we still have to live in this world. We are thankful for the contribution of the Christadelphian Bible Mission to cover part of our many costs, like paperwork and printing material, postage, copyrights, internet costs, a.o..

Passing on the message

Like Paul has been the recipient of a message and he had also passed that message along to many others, we should be prepared to go out in the world like the early Christians did.  We now do have the modern means and can make use of the internet to speak of that message concerning Christ and his work that was ‘according to the Scriptures.’  The apostle Peter refers to the “good news” that was preached and received or believed, thus resulting in “the salvation of souls”.

“and you are receiving what your trust is aiming at, namely, your deliverance.” (1 Peter 1:9 CJB)

“it was revealed to them that their service when they spoke about these things was not for their own benefit, but for yours. and these same things have now been proclaimed to you by those who communicated the good news to you through the Ruach haKodesh sent from heaven. even angels long to look into these things!” (1 Peter 1:12 CJB)

“but the word of ADONAI lasts forever. moreover, this word is the good news which has been proclaimed to you.” (1 Peter 1:25 CJB)

Transmitter of the Gospel or good news

We are convinced that more than one person has to transmit the Gospel or good news. We are aware that our role of witnessing is to transmit or communicate the message which Jesus made so clear.

May we also say that:

Successful communication of the Gospel, then, is nothing more and certainly not less than accurate communication of the content of that pre-eminent message.  In other words, whether one believes the message upon hearing it has nothing whatever to do with the role of the evangelist. {Should a believer wait to have a “burden” before witnessing?}

Goals to set forward

Looking at reactions we get in real life or by e-mails, there is no doubt that some perceive our ideas and goals as ridiculous, not feasible or too rigid. I do agree I may have set high goals, but as a believer in Christ Jesus, I am not ashamed to tackle this which might seem not practicable. Either just a handful may join efforts to bring the message of the Good News or some others would also see the importance of bringing the good News and would not mind joining hands with us, who might be idealistic and having the hope in something which is impossible for many.

Do you want to look with us at the chief goal of everything in life?

Privileged people

The Christian is privileged to participate in God’s work of glorifying Himself in the salvation of sinners.

Please, let me end with the words of Marc Minter in his article Should a believer wait to have a “burden” before witnessing?:

Thanks be to God that He has given Christians any part to play at all!

So, evangelism is telling people of the message of Jesus Christ’s redeeming work, and the witness’s role is simply to transmit that message accurately and regularly.  The ultimate purpose of witnessing is to bring glory to God in an accurate proclamation of what He has done in revealing Himself through the Gospel.

Because these are true, it seems easy to answer the questions listed at the beginning.

Should a believer wait to have a “burden” before witnessing?  No!  

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Preceding articles:

Looking for True Spirituality 1 Intro

Looking for True Spirituality 2 Not restricted to an elite

Looking for True Spirituality 3 Mind of Christ

Looking for True Spirituality 4 Getting to Know the Mind of Christ

Looking for True Spirituality 5 Fruitage of the Spirit

Looking for True Spirituality 6 Spirituality and Prayer

Looking for True Spirituality 7 Preaching of the Good News

Looking for True Spirituality 8 Measuring Up

Fruits of the spirit will prevent you from being either inactive or unfruitful

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Additional reading:

  1. יהוה , YHWH and Love: Four-letter words
  2. The radiance of God’s glory and the counsellor
  3. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love
  4. One mediator
  5. Salvation, trust and action in Jesus #3 as a Christian
  6. The Law of Christ: Law of Love
  7. Christ’s ethical teaching
  8. A Living Faith #3 Faith put into action
  9. A Living Faith #9 Our Manner of Life
  10. Our relationship with God, Jesus and each other
  11. A call easy to understand
  12. Belief of the things that God has promised
  13. Would You Run?
  14. Breathing and growing with no heir
  15. Determine the drive
  16. Compassion and Discipline
  17. Unconditional love
  18. Unarmed truth and unconditional love
  19. The first on the list of the concerns of the saint
  20. Digging in words, theories and artefacts
  21. Exceeding Great and Precious Promise
  22. The builder of the Kingdom
  23. Kingdom of God what will it be like
  24. The hands of God’s wrath
  25. Holiness and expression of worship coming from inside
  26. Some one or something to fear #7 Not afraid for Gods Name
  27. Rejoice even though bound to grieve
  28. Those who make peace should plant peace like a seed
  29. Let me saw beliefseeds
  30. Looking forward to God’s faithfulness
  31. Bringing Good News into the world
  32. The Involvement of true discipleship
  33. Testify of the things heard
  34. Proclaiming shalom, bringing good news of good things, announcing salvation
  35. Trusting, Faith, Calling and Ascribing to Jehovah #5 Prayer #2 Witnessing
  36. Obstacles to effective evangelism
  37. A Voice to be heard
  38. Creator and Blogger God 4 Expounding voice
  39. Blogging for Jesus…
  40. Preaching to an unbelieving world
  41. Words to push and pull
  42. Good or bad preacher
  43. Learn how to go out into the world and proclaim the Good News of the coming Kingdom
  44. How should we preach?
  45. Breathing to teach
  46. Bringing Good News into the world
  47. Jehovah’s Witnesses not only group that preach the good news
  48. Holland Week of billing
  49. Trying to get the youth inspired
  50. When discouraged facing opposition
  51. Messengers of Jesus will be hated to the end of time
  52. Who are you going to reach out to today
  53. Praise the God with His Name
  54. Agape, a love to share with others from the Fruit of the Spirit
  55. The Spirit of God brings love, hope and freedom
  56. Holiness and expression of worship coming from inside
  57. Belonging to or being judged by
  58. Not all will inherit the Kingdom
  59. Knowing where to go to
  60. United people under Christ
  61. Fellowship
  62. Discipleship way of life on the narrow way to everlasting life
  63. Pastorpreneur Warren
  64. Catholicism, Anabaptism and Crisis of Christianity
  65. Which Christians Actually Evangelize

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  • Renew (womenatthewellfbco.com)
    It feels so refreshing to start anew!  What better time to do that than the New Year?  Why is it that we crave renewal and how on Earth do we attain it?
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    I daily read the Bible and pray.  Each week, I participate in some form of ministry or corporate worship, or Bible study.  However, these activities can become routine, and lack vitality, lack enthusiasm, when I have been at them for awhile, or a long time.
  • 2014: Set a standard, early (jeremycainbiblestudies.wordpress.com)
    If you would just begin to set a standard early on this year spiritually in your prayer, bible study and reading, and service then you will find that when it comes November you’re not going to be wondering how did this year pass you by and you still feel no closer to God.  Think of the discipline and strength you would built up by the end of this year if you just begin right now, right this day, praying just one hour a day, every day.
  • Why I Am a Christian. (crawfordgarrett.wordpress.com)
    I have to admit that it’s not always the most simple and straightforward answer to give, because there are many reasons that have led to my faith in Christ.  However, I guess the first place to start is with my parents.  I am a Christian because of my parents.  There may be nothing remarkable about that, and often times I, or many other Christians, would not like to admit that truth.  I am a Christian because my parents are Christians, and that’s what they raised me to believe, just like Jesus was a Jew because His parents were Jews.
  • My Prayer for 2014 (planetsellas.wordpress.com)
    I don’t deserve anything from God. I have repeatedly broken his laws; I am a rebel.
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    Lord, I pray that you show me how I can spread your gospel and give honor and praise to your name. I want more people to know you and love you, Lord.  God, I really want to lead someone to Christ this year. A friend, a family member, or a complete stranger. I want to do this not so that I may boast or get any glory–kill the pride in me. No, Lord I want to do so that you may be glorified.
  • Living Out the Gospel in 2014 (craighamlin.wordpress.com)
    Whatever your resolutions are for 2014, I want to encourage you to make one overarching commitment for everyday in 2014: to live out the Gospel of Jesus Christ for the glory of God.The Gospel is the saving message that Jesus Christ died for your sin, He was buried and that He was raised from the dead according to the Scriptures (1 Cor. 15:3-4). However, the Gospel goes far beyond that to the transformation of every area of life. The Gospel penetrates our attitudes, actions, and dictates the affairs of life. The Gospel is not just a message, it is the transforming power of Christ to make us more like Him. God’s grace working through faith and empowered by the Holy Spirit makes it possible to live for Christ. Therefore, God saves us to live for Him and shine as lights in a dark world. Our commitment everyday must be to live out the gospel for the glory of God.
  • Christ didn’t come to help us, He came to Include us (melwild.wordpress.com)
    a surprising few resonate so much to the more important fact that the Father’s plan was to substitute Christ for us and place us in Him. I think this is unfortunate.
  • Jesus Christ was an Anarchist (blacksupremacylovenunity.wordpress.com) > Jesus Christ was an Anarchist
    Jesus came along to lead his followers out of this ungodly Roman system, preaching an alternative form of government. He spoke of a jurisdiction outside of the Roman state, based on the perfect law of freedom, outside the tyranny of men who would rule over their brothers and neighbors. He unified the early Christian church in a system of charity, hope and respect for the rights of each other, requiring that each person love thy neighbor as thy self in a system of mutual, not governmental support.
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    Jesus was showing a way to untangle people from the captivity of the social contracts they had made with the state of Rome and Judea, and the tribute and obligations they had become snared by. He proclaimed to call no man “Father”, as they called their Roman benefactors, but stated that “thou Father art in heaven.” The perfect law of freedom indicated that man’s unalienable rights stemmed from God and nature, and not governments of men. This was a system of anarchy, by strict definition, without the complex system of tribute that led to the decadence and decline of society, and the corruptible force of the state to back it up.The early Christian church was not persecuted for their belief in a different God or a Kingdom in Heaven, but for their opting out of the mutual taxation system and seeking to live apart from the kings and overlords, the gods many, who demanded their tribute.
    +Today, most of us find ourselves under slothful tribute to an emperor and a system that is not for our benefit. We have coveted our neighbor’s goods in a vain pursuit of “free” health care, education, welfare, unemployment benefits, social security and government protection. We have traded our inalienable God-given rights through social contracts both implied and explicit. Our churches are not ordained by God, but are 501(c)(3) corporations granted status by the state.As we head into what is certainly going to be a volatile 2014, we are going to need to dig down deep and find that anarchist in all of us, with a little more loving thy neighbor as thy self to boot. Happy New Year!
  • Change Your Village (elderyvesjohnson.wordpress.com)
    This week you might meet someone new and probably see some old friends and acquaintances.  Do they know Who you belong to?  Do they know the wonderful life you now enjoy?  If so, are you sharing this great gift with them?
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    It’s true Christians need to be encouraged and challenged.  Yet, unbelievers will not be knocking down the church door to learn about Christ. It can happen but I don’t think it will on a large-scale.  Why would they want to learn about Christ if His followers won’t even talk to them?
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    You should follow Jesus’ words, not those belonging to naysayers and unbelievers. You have been strategically positioned in your family, circle of friends, neighborhood, job, school, etc., to show, teach and talk about the goodness of Christ to those individual.  They need to know about the opportunity for salvation.  Who will tell them?  If not you, then who?
  • Fanatic hindu who hated christians is an evidence of Jesus (pciniraj.wordpress.com)
    I never liked Christian missionaries. I used to speak against Christianity and was organising people near the temples against the evangelism activites.“But Lord Jesus mightly fighting for His children, if anybody persecuting Christians, for which I am a clear evidence”, now I am witnessing this every corner to corner by holding the Holy Bible in one hand and showing my terrific stomach to the public. “I was an enemy of Christians, but Jesus Christ loved me, made me alive and saved me from sin and death. Now I am His servant”. This is my testimony.
  • Pouring Into Others (comeawake.org)
    If you are a Christian, you are a disciple of Christ. You know Him, but what have you done to make Him known to others? And I’m not just talking about evangelism. I’m talking about how you can use your time, your energy and most importantly, your knowledge about who Christ is to help out a fellow brother or sister.The purpose of our lives is simply this: To know Christ, and to make Him known.

Having children interferes with work

Today there is a negative attitude towards having children and taking care of children.

Family Portrait

Family Portrait (Photo credit: Gideon Tsang)

It’s true that having children interferes with work. Lots of people do find it hurts their career in the short and long term. some do find it normal that those who get kids should be penalised in their professional career and in the later years of retirement. For them it is very logical that those who stayed at home can not receive retirement allowance for those years they were not productive for the economical world.

As it should, in a fair world. What else can you expect to happen when you take time away from actually doing work? But even if there would be no impact on my career, I still would not want children.

writes .

Breadwinner

SDT-2013-05-breadwinner-moms-1-1

“breadwinner moms” are made up of two very different groups: 5.1 million (37%) are married mothers who have a higher income than their husbands, and 8.6 million (63%) are single mothers.

A recent study by Pew Research in the States, details the trend: In 15 percent of all households of married adults with children under the age of 18, mothers are the sole or primary breadwinner. That’s up from 4 percent back in 1960, and accounts for 5.1 million married mothers who have higher incomes than their husbands.

Stay-at-home dads face many of the economic challenges and concerns as stay-at-home moms — how transitioning from two salaries to one will impact their family, if the time at home might hinder a return to the job force, and whether new roles will cause resentment. But stay-at-home dads often face cultural stigmas about what it means to be a man in America, and what price tag that role should carry.

Paychecks

More women than ever are CEO’s of Fortune 500 companies and in every day households more women are bringing home bigger paychecks than their husbands.
The median total family income of married mothers who earn more than their husbands was nearly $80,000 in 2011, well above the national median of $57,100 for all families with children, and nearly four times the $23,000 median for families led by a single mother.
The income gap between the two groups remains when using personal income as the measure. The median personal income of married mothers who out-earn their husbands was $50,000 in 2011, compared with $20,000 for single moms. Both personal and family income was self-reported. There is a small difference between the median personal income of single mothers and their family income. It could be due to financial contributions of other adult family members such as a cohabiting partner or a parent.

Since 2007 (before the recession officially began) mothers’ views about whether and how much they would like to work had changed significantly. The share of mothers saying their ideal situation would be to work full time increased from 20% in 2007 to 32% in 2012. And the share saying they would prefer not to work at all fell from 29% to 20%.

Gains of women and motherhood

Rally for single parents and their children

Rally for single parents and their children (Photo credit: Greens MP Jamie Parker, Member for Balmain)

A new Pew Research Center survey finds that the public remains of two minds about the gains mothers have made in the workplace–most recognize the clear economic benefits to families, but many voice concerns about the toll that having a working mother may take on children or even marriage.
About three-quarters of adults (74%) say the increasing number of women working for pay has made it harder for parents to raise children, and half say that it has made marriages harder to succeed. At the same time, two-thirds say it has made it easier for families to live comfortably.

In Belgium this can be clearly seen at the amount of divorces which soar the pan. It’s really far out and most children are just dropped at childcare early in the morning to be fetched late at night to be put in bed. the aim to live comfortably having enough luxury to show off to others has become more important than family life.

Primary child attendant

Making the shift from primary breadwinner to a primary caregiver can be so dramatic, especially if that change comes after a job loss, that it got so much negative press to give them who would consider to stay home a nasty shock. Lots of people are put off by the idea to take a part time job and staying some time at home to take care for the kids.

Many youngsters also find it not done that somebody stays at home not being productive in the world economy, and those who would perhaps originally would love to have a family with kids can not afford children and take all efforts not to be with child.

A house or a child

Facing the cost of children many consider it better to by a house instead spening all that money on a child.

And yes, it costs over $200,000 to raise a child to 18. That’s a lot of money to throw away. You could buy a decent house for that price. But even if everything a child would need is was free, even if I was actually paid for having a child, I still would not want children.

writes to the Natalist World.

Bettering oneself through education

According to them having children interferes with bettering oneself through education. Many think when they have to spend time at bringing up children they themselves would not have enough time for themselves. Having children, according to them also takes away the focus from more important work. There are great opportunities for growth and learning even in our sometimes boring 9-5 desk jobs, so why should people use the other time for taking care of the household? After work should there not be fun?
Leisure has become a very important business in our welfare industry.

Well, parents should see that it should already be fun that they are taking the time to invest in them-self and learning more about their world and that they could get other people involved in what they do with their children. There are not only the out-of school events, sports and games the children can enjoy. Also watching documentaries with the partner and kids or work on puzzles with the children, playing trivial pursuit with the family, or discuss new and fresh topics with them and with the friends of yourself, your partner and new friends the children let you know.
Claiming that children will limit your world is not seeing that they will do the opposite, getting you to know more people outside your daily job.

Studying together

English: The Green Children in Bangladesh

The Green Children in Bangladesh (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When you would like to study something new, your kids do not have to be a stand in the way. Things aren’t just going to be different for you – your kids will also feel the effect of you taking on a new project. However, they may be so proud of your attempt to forward your career that they may surprise you and help out around the house to give you extra time to focus. One way to include them in your endeavours is to set up study groups for all of you to sit down and do your homework together. Why not? This shall inspire you both and it will be much more fun for them than the ordinary school work they have to do obligatory.

In the old days, ‘bettering yourself’ was usually related to improving your social status, often through education and certainly by getting a better job. These days, you can take a wider perspective. Life is much more than earning money. We do not have to measure everything in the form of investment for receiving financial gain.

Pets or children

Flexcin International, Inc., a company that makes natural supplements for humans and pets, found that according to its recent survey, more Americans are electing to house dogs over kids.

The company polled 1,250 pet owners nationwide (ages 21 to 30) about their attitudes on child rearing and pet adoption.

When asked what’s a better fit for them, more than half (54 percent) of respondents said dogs; 46 percent said children.

When asked why they prefer dogs, 34 percent of respondents said they’re not sure if they can handle the needs of raising a child; 28 percent said they don’t have the time to raise a child; 21 percent said kids are more expensive than dogs; and 17 percent said they “just love” dogs more than kids.

If it was polling people with pets, specifically the kind likely to care enough to give their kids supplements, I would think they’d be more likely to get a pet-friendly answer by such people than they would the general public.

I’m childfree and have one dog, but I did Not choose pets over kids any more than I choose driving a sports car over being slapped in the face. That is, the two things have little to nothing to do with each other. Sure, I prefer one over the other, but that doesn’t mean that I chose one over the other.

Many people who do have kids also have pets. It’s not like people can only have one or the other. On the other hand, even if, for some reason, I had decided to never have pets, I still wouldn’t want kids. It’s not like I’m required to have either.

Unpleasant burden

The writer let us hear a voice we can hear at many places. She like many youngsters today do not care much for children. Pets or no, children would be nothing but an unpleasant burden to them. they prefer to enjoy undisturbed sex with their partner, without having any commitments to this partner or for any off-springs of their sexual action.

They shudder to think of how much they  would miss out on in life if ever they became a mother or father. Kids would be a stumble bloc at their leg, limiting their freedom where to go and what to do. Parenthood is totally undesirable to them. It has even come so far that many think “kids would ruin their life”.

The reality is that parenthood is not a fairy-tale filled with Kodak moments. It’s nasty business. There are gross bodily functions, dangers, bitter fights, sleepless nights, tantrums, and regrets. It’s not always pretty. But even if the life of parenthood really was all sunshine, rainbows, kisses, hugs, “I love your”s, and macaroni art, I still would not want children.

confirms ‘childfree’.

Overcrowding

To her horror,

the world population is over 7 billion. That’s far too many humans for one small planet with dwindling resources and a climate on the brink of disaster. It’s dangerous. But even if the world were not overpopulated, even if it was somehow underpopulated, I still would not want children.

At an early age youngsters do want to enjoy sex and more than once we find kids who are with child and have to stop further education. Taking time away from school has a high price. This lack of further education may also bring more difficulties to higher a person in a good paid job. Resulting in receiving less income than somebody who studied longer, the children often came in the same street as their parents and because of the family struggles also start misbehaving, sometimes criminally so.

Benefits

But having stopped studies early in adulthood should not be a reason not to progress and to continue taking up knowledge and wisdom.

Having children in such an instance should also not be a burden, but could be used as a blessing. When giving up some time to spend with the kids they also can provide new knowledge and reasons enough to study further on your own.

The final stage is to build a series of stepping stones towards your self-betterment. List all the activities that you do now and assess how you spend your time. Then ask yourself which ones contribute to your aim and how. Get not blindfolded by others or get blind by the financial gain you may receive by not being present for your children but at work for an employer.

The work you have to do at home, is not be paid for in money, but it shall be more profitable to you than man think. You yourself have to make the choice, either to be there for your children or to be there for yourself or a company.

Obligation

SDT-2013-05-breadwinner-moms-1-2

A new Pew Research Center survey finds that the public remains of two minds about the gains mothers have made in the workplace–most recognize the clear economic benefits to families, but many voice concerns about the toll that having a working mother may take on children or even marriage. About three-quarters of adults (74%) say the increasing number of women working for pay has made it harder for parents to raise children, and half say that it has made marriages harder to succeed. At the same time, two-thirds say it has made it easier for families to live comfortably.

As parents it is the obligation to take care for those who came after sexual enjoyment. There are enough preservative measures if people do not want children, but once they are there they shall have to consider them and have the sense of duty.

Both parents shall have to find answers how to manage properly the household. they shall have to choose who is going to play which role, or how they can divide the household tasks. They shall need to change how they use their time.

Banker-turned-financial-advisor Denise Winston of Money Start Here says that when either parent decides to stay home, it’s important to run the numbers on both sides of the equation. Not only is this important for budgeting, but it helps emphasize how the stay-at-home parent is contributing financially to the household, even when they’re no longer bringing in a traditional salary.

“Ask, how much is child care? That could easily be $2,000 a month. Did you have a housekeeper, commute, laundry service? If one parent is now providing those services, that’s a tremendous savings,” she says.

Winston warns that a parent exiting the workforce might need a crash course in domestic finances.

“When you think about how much money flows through that person’s hands — groceries, back to school, prescriptions — if they’re not into getting a good deal, this could potentially cost the household a ton of money. You have to look at it like a sport, or a business.”

Having children may interfere with many plans, and could require another budget use, but parents should be aware it is not the money which shall make them as happy as the blessings and pleasure those children can bring.

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This is a reaction on: Letters To A Natalist World: I Don’t Want Children Because I Don’t Want Children

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Find also:

  1. What I “Regret” About Being Childfree
  2. Choosing Pets Over Kids?
  3. Why are people choosing pets over kids?
  4. Welfare state and Poverty in Flanders #8 Work
  5. Welfare state and Poverty in Flanders #12 Conclusion
  6. Work with joy and pray with love
  7. Gender Roles, What?
  8. Stay-at-Home Dads Get a Crash Course in Family Finances (and Guilt)
  9. Breadwinner Moms
  10. Only I can change my life
  11. Leaving behind the lives we have touched.
  12. The business of this life
  13. Power in the life of certain
  14. A person is limited only by the thoughts that he chooses
  15. Thirst for happiness and meaning
  16. Be happy that the thorn bush has roses
  17. Suffering produces perseverance
  18. Change
  19. It is a free will choice
  20. Your life the sum total of all your choices
  21. Monotomy of life
  22. Teach children the Bible
  23. Words in the world
  24. We should use the Bible every day
  25. Created to live in relation with God
  26. Life in gratitude opens glory of God
  27. A Living Faith #8 Change
  28. A Living Faith #10: Our manner of Life #2
  29. Choose you this day whom ye will serve

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  • Women rising up as breadwinners of today’s modern family (theage.com.au)
    More Australian women are bringing home the lion’s share of the household income with females nominated as the breadwinner in one in four Australian households.More than half a million Australian households now have a female as the major wage earner – 140,000 more households than a decade ago.Female-breadwinner households are more likely to be couple-only households and households on lower incomes, according to the National Centre for Social and Economic Modelling published Wednesday report.
  • The Stay at Home Mom Hobby Guide (coupons.answers.com)
    For much of the day, stay-at-home moms are busy caring for their children as well as the household. Running errands, cleaning, driving kids to school, and washing loads of laundry are just a few of the tasks of a stay-at-home mom. A hobby can be a great way for a stay-at-home mom to take a little time to explore her own talents. She may love to write, paint pictures, or take photographs. These creative hobbies can help her to relax. A hobby can also contribute to maintaining the family budget. For instance, couponing is a hobby that many moms are interested in. A mom finds coupons and then figures out how to use them to her best advantage. In short, the hobbies of a stay-at-home mom can benefit a family’s finances. The following outlines a selection of hobbies that stay-at-homes may want to look into.
  • Stay At Home Mom… (1luckygal.com)
    I guess at this moment I am moving out of the realm of stay at home motherhood and into the work at home motherhood realm, for a minute I was a working single mom and then I was a working mom and before that I was a stay at home mom. So basically I have done the loop. I know that no matter what your motherhood status is, that we are all mothers. We are all trying very hard to raise a child who will go on to participate in society in an appropriate and independent way.
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    Just like there is no reason you should be less or more respected if your doing less of the very hard work of mothering and more of the very hard work of having a career. We should just respect each other because it takes a village and a village missing things like stay at home moms, stay at home dads, two income families, old people keeping track of the neighborhood from their window becomes less of a village then our children deserve.
  • Thought You Noticed More Stay-at-Home Dads? You’re Right! Here’s Why (thebump.com)
    A new study published in the Journal of Family Issues noted that more than half-million dads are staying home with the kids as stay-at-home fathers. The research, conducted by sociologist Karen Z. Kramer of the University of Illinois, noted that when compared to moms staying home with the kids, stay-at-home dads who were not stay at home by choice tended to be older and less educated than moms. Most were also disabled, ill or unemployed. But among men who chose to be a stay-at-home dad, most tended to be higher-income with wives with greater earning potential and had more children under 5.
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    While traditional family roles are changing, so too is the make-up of the typical family.Families with two natural parents and two children make up 28 per cent of all families with kids.Couple families with one child are the second most common at 23 per cent, followed by single parents with one child at 15 per cent.

    However, one of the largest increases has been in the number of blended and stepfamilies – doubling in recent decades, to make up almost 11 per cent of Australian families with dependent children, compared with 6.8 per cent in 1986.

  • Study: ‘House Husbands’ More Common Than Ever (nation.time.com)
    More dads are staying at home with the kids, according to a new study in the Journal of Family Issues.The study used data from the Census Bureau’s Current Population Survey to compare characteristics of families in which at least one spouse had a full-time job. Researchers found that between 1976 and 2009, the percentage of households with stay-at-home dads increased steadily.Over the last decade, the percentage of house dads increased to 3.5%, or 550,000 dads. In the ’70s, only 280,000 men were staying at home, representing only 2% of the families analyzed.
  • The Working Mom… an Oxymoron? (milnechelsea.wordpress.com)
    There’s such a thing called “mother’s guilt.”  It starts once she first gives birth and realizes she has some options regarding whether or not she should work.  Interestingly, regardless of her decision, over half of mothers documented by the Working Mother Research Institute in both categories feel guilty.In fact, 51 percent of working mothers feel guilty about not spending enough time with their children.   55 percent of stay-at-home mothers feel guilty for not contributing to family income.  WMRI
  • Number of the Week: Rise of Single Moms Drives Down Overall Income (blogs.wsj.com)
    New data this week showed once again that it’s been a rough couple decades for the American middle class. Median household income barely budged in 2012, and is actually lower, after adjusting for inflation, than it was in 1989. “This isn’t a lost decade for economic gains for Americans,” the Washington Post’s Neil Irwin wrote on Tuesday. “It is a lost generation.”
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    The median income for all families with children under 18 was just under $60,000 last year, up about 3% since 1990 after adjusting for inflation. But what might once have been considered the “typical” American family — a married couple, living together, with at least one child under 18 — has done quite a bit better: Their median income was $81,455, up nearly 16% from 1990.The trouble is, such families have become significantly less common over time. In 1980, married couples made up 80% of all families with children. A decade later, that figure had fallen below 75%. Today, it’s less than two-thirds. The number of families headed by single moms — any mother with no spouse present, regardless of whether she has a live-in partner — has increased more than 30% since 1990, to more than 10 million.
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    In terms of income growth, single moms aren’t actually doing much worse than their married counterparts — their median income is up 14% since 1990, nearly as much as for married parents. But they earn far less in absolute terms. The median income for a family headed by a single mother was $25,493 in 2012, which means roughly 5 million single mothers earn less than $25,000 a year.
  • Recognizing the “SAHD” (timesunion.com)
    A few male twitter users recently blasted me for neglecting to include stay-at-home dads in various online discussions. I honestly hadn’t given a serious thought to the fact that there are plenty of fathers filling the shoes stay-at-home-moms traditionally stand in. I shamefully admit that I was oblivious to men who are staying home to care for their children. While the definition the US Census Bureau has been using to base their family and living arrangement statistics on produces small numbers, the reality is much more impressive: nearly 1.5 million men are SAHDs (Stay-at-home-dads) today, and this number continues to climb as women are assuming more demanding / valuable roles in the workplace.
  • Building a more father-friendly Calgary (metronews.ca)
    How father-friendly is our city? That’s an important question, and not just for local fathers and families. The answer has implications for women, the economy, and the overall strength of our communities.
  • Pew research reveals more women becoming ‘breadwinners’ (nbc-2.com)
    More women are bringing home the bacon, while their husbands take care of the chores at home.
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    According to the Pew Research Center, mothers are the sole or primary provider in four out of ten U.S. households with children.These ‘breadwinner moms’ are broken into two groups: 37 percent are married mothers while 63 percent are single mothers.